CNY without him

Saturday, February 09, 2013

Today is the eve of Chinese New Year. Come tomorrow, it will be the Year of the Water Snake. But this time there would not be any celebration for us as we are still going through a mourning period based on Chinese Taoist customs. We didn't do much spring cleaning like we always did & any form of CNY decoration is not allowed.

We still had a reunion dinner among ourselves; but the dishes are only less elaborate. For the past 3 years, Grandpa was not fit to join us at the table during dinner but nevertheless, he was still aware & happily looked from afar seated at his favourite sofa. This year felt different without him around. Somehow, the dinner became a solemn event & a quiet one. I'd be lying that deep down, all of us didn't miss him a lot.

I supposed this is how it feels having to lose someone dear to you. More so when it's close to CNY when everything should be cheerful & prosperous has now become silent & lonely. Grandpa, though we're no longer celebrating with you, we hoped that you're also having a hearty meal "elsewhere". Don't worry about us. We'll continue taking care of Grandma as promised.