Another bad day

Friday, July 03, 2009

Driving myself to the test location while trying to calm my nerves is already a daunting task to deal with. What's more, having to deal with claustrophobia is not helping the whole situation. After parking the car, I found my way to the nearest lift which turned out to be a service lift furnished with black paddings around the walls. That's when my phobia kicked in - knees feeling weak, numb & wobbly while my heart thumps hardly on my chest. That moment seemed like forever as I stood still; struggling to regain composure while cold sweat trickled down my forehead.

As soon as the lift halted on the 5th floor, I quickly dashed out & flee to the loo. I'm not close to peeing in my skirt, mind you. Only checking to see whether my face had turned pale green. Anyways, fast forward to the test scene. For the first time, I interacted with the other candidates - supposedly to be my archrivals competing for the same position. Rather odd for me but oh well...*shrugs* Seems fun~

The one thing which really turns off your mood is that when the examiners announce that you fail to proceed to the next round. And seeing other candidates who've succeeded make you feel even more devastated & embarrassed. Like a failure. What really struck me hard is that I keep on failing aptitude tests countless times that I actually lost count. =(

Just when you thought of finding solace from your other half after an awful day, he cancelled last minute. It wasn't WL's fault to be honest...knowing that he has a more hectic schedule compared to mine. However, everything goes awry especially when you have a bad start for the entire day. I was disappointed, so to speak. But what can we do about it? Shit just happens every now & then. Nobody is wrong. Blame it on bad timing. How did I de-stress? I just cried myself to sleep. Sounds exhausting but it works for me. Hmm...